Thursday, March 5, 2009

[JessFinds] If I ruled the world

Inevitably Spring brings with it a sweeping sense of change. We are still in the dregs of winter, but I love pouring over the fashion sites and blogs about season trends. I love Fashion Week. It is true that I am a big ol' mom, opting for jeans and a t-shirt 99.9% of the time. But my jeans are wide legged and my tees are layered whisper knit, ok!? I buy heels and place them on a pedistal because while I picture myself fabulous and put-together, the reality is more like "Oh hell, my socks don't match and I have not shaved my legs in 3 weeks."

I am gravely disappointed in the offering to the fashion gods this year.

Nudes? Nudes? Seriously? I get that pale is back in fashion (thank you, thank you) but to take said pale girl off the runway and put her in reality wearing nothing but tones of blush and beige is just wrong. Yes, all ethereal and whispy on the catwalk. All "WTF - is she naked?" in reality.

Bared midriffs? Seriously? I am 35 in a few weeks and I have not bared my midriff since I was 21 or 22. With good reason. Apparently, Spring is only for those with tight abs! I am not stuffy but I believe in doing age-appropriate clothing, especially when that age has two kids and an artisan cheese addiction. Thank you Tim Gunn.

Polka dots and stripes? Again? Seriously? Why is it that Spring comes around and we all dress like we are on shore leave? Is this some sick influence the Gap has had on our overall culture?

Jewel-encrusted clothing. Unkay. Yeah, cuz nothing is more appropriate during a crap economy than to prance around dressed like Liberace. Or maybe we are channeling some sort of Soviet cold war irony "No. This is not my estate sewn in to my jacket. It is the latest trend. I got it at Kohls. Let me through customs, please."

The only thing I am digging on so far is the soft florals. There are some nicely shaped blouses and dresses done in a faded old wallpaper-esq (oh yeah, I "esqued") look. Very feminine but still with a cool, not prarie, vibe.


Joie said...

I agree. Doesn't look good.

Marie said...

i need a huge wardrobe overhaul. I have been either pregnant or breast feeding now for ... almost three years. i haven't really bought new non-maternity clothes in that timeframe. I donated FIVE OUTDOOR GARBAGE BAGS worth of clothes at Christmas. All I own are suits that don't really fit (yet? anymore?), two pair of jeans that are really still not appropriate for my newly post-baby body and handful of long sleeved t-shirts. But I refuse to buy clothes until I have lost more baby boy weight. My co-workers must have a pool going on my clothing rotation.

And by the way, those long sleeved t-shirts? most of them have been worn through two pregnancies. And they look like it...

I got some nice visa card gift certificates I have been hording ... unless i end up needing them to buy groceries.