Wednesday, September 17, 2008

[JessFinds] It is a topsy turvy world

I am doing my normal thing, working at night with the kids snoozing. I have the TV on in the background - CNN. And it is a topsy turvy world. Apparently Wamu has applied for some sort of protection because they are going down. Wamu used to be one of my clients back in the TMP Worldwide days. The news is now assuring everyone that they are FDIC protected so they don't need to panic if Wamu crashes. At the same time, Morgan Stanley is eyeing a merger with Wachovia to save their backside too.

Topsy turvy crazy wackadoo I say.

Preacher and I feel like we are bouncing on quicksand these days. Pardon the cliche, but I am so sick of being sick. I finally have a meeting with an endocrinologist tomorrow. It was an appointment five months in the making! I am a human pincushion. I can't even count how many doctor appointments I have had this year. It gets so thick with appointments that I start accidentally missing work related appointments and the last thing I want to do professionally is say "yeah, but I am loaded on SSRI's and benzos, dizzy with anemia and I have a goiter so you need to cut me some slack." I think goiter has got to be one of the worst words in the English language - up there with moist. I feel like I should blush when I say or type it. Anyway, just not something you casually discuss with employers.

MIL is helping us out with a few house projects but we are wary of putting anything in to the house that we would not recoup. We are both suffering from a bad case of burnout and are just waiting for an excuse to jump ship. I think we are afraid to look at one another for fear of one of us saying: let's run.

I am so ready to move back to Oregon and build a yurt on my mom's acreage (a longstanding joke that is starting to sound good). Raise my babies with my friends. I know my girlfriends hate their jobs - can't we find something that we can do that allows us to maintain a professional identity while being available to our kids? I want to help my mom build out her business. I miss my people. I know I am not the only one who is isolated by the clergy "lifestyle" but I just remember having so much FUN prior to our latest move. I want some fun back. I was fine being a babymomma and writing freelance articles. Preacher was happy making a difference in the lives of kids and their families. I want that back.


Oh, and we bought a table. That table above. It has a way of looking both colonial and modern at the same time. It has a 20 inch leaf, six chairs - so it expands from a circle to an oval for all the entertaining we do these days (ha). It was actually a gift, a gift that solves a few minor aesthetic problems of a high traffic area and it gives me a temporary feeling of happiness. Phhhhhbt!

1 comment:

Joie said...

Great looking table. Is it replacing the other one or going somewhere else?

All this crap with the economy does mean either staying put for many of us whether we like it or not or jumping ship and dealing with more stringent bankruptcy laws. I prefer the former at this point. Just remember, at least we are not 50+ and therefore closer to retirement. We have chosen to do the things to our place that we want in order to make it worth living there for us and not think so much about selling.